The Legend of Frank

[conker]

The Legend of Frank



A man walks into the street and manages to get a taxi just going by. He gets
into the taxi, and the cabbie says, "Perfect timing. You're just like Frank.

"Passenger: "Who?"



Cabbie: "Frank Feldman. He's a guy who did everything right - all the time.
Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to
Frank Feldman every single time."



Passenger: "There are always a few clouds over everybody."



Cabbie: "Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the
Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera
baritone and danced like a Broadway

star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy"



Passenger: "Sounds like he was something really special"



Cabbie: "There's more.He had a memory like a computer. Could remember
everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which
fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse,
and the whole street blacks out. But Frank Feldman, he could do everything
right."

Passenger. "Wow, some guy then."

Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic
jams, not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never
made a mistake"



Passenger. "Mmm, there's not many like him around."

Cabbie: "And he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good and
never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was
always immaculate, shoes highly polished too - he was the perfect man! He
never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank Feldman."

Passenger: "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?"



Cabbie: "Well, I never actually met Frank."



Passenger: "Then how do you know so much about him?"



Cabbie: "I married his bloody widow."