mathematics

[conker]

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS
>Smart man + smart woman = romance
>Smart man + dumb woman = affair
>Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
>Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
>______________________________
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>OFFICE ARITHMETIC
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>Smart boss + smart employee = profit
>Smart boss + dumb employee = production
>Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
>Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
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>SHOPPING MATH
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>A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs. A woman will pay $10 for a $20
>item that she doesn't need.
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>GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
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>A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
>A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
>A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
>A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
>_____________________________
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>HAPPINESS
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>To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a
>little.
>To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand
>her at all.
>______________________________
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>LONGEVITY
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>Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more
>willing to die.
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>PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
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>A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
>A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
>_____________________________
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>DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
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>A woman has the last word in any argument.
>Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
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>HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED
>Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and
>cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the
>same thing to them at funerals.
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>SEND THIS TO A SMART WOMAN WHO NEEDS A LAUGH AND TO THE SMART GUYS YOU KNOW
>CAN HANDLE IT.
>

[peggy]

Dumb Man + Smart Woman = Marriage, got in one Conker. :giggle