two before we go

a man with a loud voice walks into the doctors.
good morning sir says the nurse, wots the problem?
its my d--k, says the man.
which brought about giggling from the other patients.
sir, can you keep your voice down please or just say that you have a problem with your ear and tell the doctor the real problem when you see him.
ok nurse says the man. i will start again.
good morning sir says the nurse, (again), wots the problem ?
its my ear, says the man.
and wot excactly is the problem with your ear, sir.
i cant p--s out of it, says the man.



dad was seeing his 2 sons off to school. wots for dinner dad, they asked.
its a suprise. wait till you get home and see, said the dad.
after he had done the chores (like all of us men do) he got his gun and went off into the woods.
the first thing that he seen was a deer so he shot it, took it home, cut it up and threw it in the pan.
when the kids got home they asked wot was cooking in the pan.
ive told you, its a suprise, said the dad.
please tell us dad, it smells really good, said the kids
ok, i will give you a clue he replied. its wot your mother sometimes calls me, he said.
one son turns to the other and says,
if he thinks that i am going to eat ars---le, he has got another thing coming.


sorry dottie:bolt